Kindercare potty training policy: Potty Training | KinderCare

7 Lessons from a Potty-Training Legend

Hattie Mae Covington is a veritable toilet learning legend—no wonder when you consider she’s been teaching 2-year-olds for 40 years at a KinderCare in Charlotte, North Carolina. Every day she helps toddlers work toward and achieve this major milestone. Want a little at-home assistance? Here Covington  shares her seven real-world strategies for effective (and happy!) potty training:

1) I watch for the potty walk.

Covington looks closely for physical and emotional signs that a child is ready for toilet learning.

Toilet tip: If your child is pulling at her diaper, sneaking off into a corner to poop privately, or has begun to do that telltale potty walk, she may be ready to start learning about using the toilet.

2) We go in a group.

Children often want to do whatever their friends are doing, which can make a classroom setting a great place for toilet learning.

Toilet tip: Encourage your child to follow the out-of-diapers crowd by giving him a chance to observe other children going potty, be it classmates, siblings, or friends’ kiddos. He will learn by example.

3) We go every hour.

Children learn through the repetition and a routine gives them lots of chances to practice. Covington does not expect young children to consistently realize or remember to tell her every time they have to use the bathroom.

Toilet tip: Sticking to a schedule may help your child have more successful trips to the potty.  Of course, if your little one says that she needs to go pee-pee in between designated times, by all means, head to the loo!

4) We have fun.

Children enjoy putting paper in and flushing the toilet.

Toilet tip: Turn the whole event into a fun game for toddlers. Start by enthusiastically asking, “What time is it?! It’s potty break time!” And let them lead the way with a dance.

5) We sing a song.

Two-year-olds are often in a hurry to get back to their friends or a favorite activity, so singing slows them down and gives them the extra time they may need to poop.

Toilet tip: Singing helps children stay calm and entertained while they are on the potty. It also signals that potty time is a relaxed moment to connect with mom or dad rather than an unpleasant chore to be rushed or fussed through.

6) I am never hard on a child.

Children develop at their own pace—for a young child, expectations or time limits for potty training will only create unnecessary pressure. If a child isn’t ready to use the toilet, Covington  doesn’t force the issue; she simply continues offering the chance to practice. “We just try—and most of the time we have success,” she says.

Toilet tip: Take the pressure off of your child (and yourself!) by thinking of a trip to the toilet is a “try,” not a pop quiz on potty proficiency. And remember that accidents are a normal part of learning.

7) Encouragement is the real motivator.

In Covington ’s classroom, every “try” is celebrated, and success brings hand-clapping and Covington ’s coveted high fives.

Toilet tip: Trust that your child will develop in her own time and share in her pride with every success. “They are so proud of themselves when they do it,” Covington  says. “If they can go, they will.”

Want to read more? Check out our guide to positive potty practices!

Major Milestones

Caring For Kids

Potty Training

Judgement-Free Parenting

Toddler

Pre-K

From Our Educators

Positive parenting

Preschool (3-5)

Potty Training Letter To ParentsDaycare.

com Presents

This is the letter I give to parents who are interested in beginning potty training their child in my home. I thought it would be something readers may be able to use for their own business to explain the process and some of the difficulties in working with parents to get on the same page.

Potty Training in the Daycare
I have had a few questions recently from parents of children two and up regarding their child’s readiness to begin toilet training. I have shared some of our ideas and routines with some parents but thought it would be easier for all if I wrote down a few power points regarding training so we could all be on the same page.

I think it’s a common misconception that most children potty train during the twos. In my experience with children in the day care and children entering the day care it is usually around the age of three for girls and three and a half for boys. Some kids do train earlier or later than that. The youngest kid I have ever trained was 22 months and the oldest was four. It’s a pretty wide range of “normal”.

If you feel your little one is ready, I would like to share with you some ideas and experiences to help the process. We have some basic policies when the time comes to begin training. I’ve put in bold the most important points. This may sound awfully official but honestly this is all to help make this go easily for everyone.

Let’s define a potty trained child:

A potty trained child is a child who can do the following:
1) Be able to TELL the adult they have to go potty BEFORE they have to go. They must be able to say the words “I have to go potty” BEFORE they have to go.
2) Be able to pull down their underwear and pants and get them back up without assistance.
3) Be able to wipe themselves after using the toilet.
4) Be able to get off the potty by themselves.
5) Be able to wash and dry hands.
6) Be able to go directly back to the room without directions.
7) Be able to postpone going if they must wait for someone who is in the bathroom or if we are outside and away from the house.

The first one is the number one key to successful training. Children who are ready to train have the ability to perceive events that are going to happen before they happen. Because we cannot allow children to just go in and out of the room to freely use the potty they MUST learn they have to tell us so that we can accompany them into the room and supervise them. At home you can allow them free access to the bathroom if you choose but we are prohibited by our regulations to allow them to go unaccompanied. Because of this they need to learn that they must tell the adult they have to go BEFORE they have to go. We do not accept signs that the child has to go or nonverbal behavior. It must be the words “I have to go potty”.

Is your child ready to begin training?
Sometimes parents feel that if their child is able to actually pee on a potty at home when the parent places them on the potty that this is the sign they are ready to train. From my experience this is not necessarily a sign. I have seen many children who are able to do this who actually trained more than a year after they were able to do this. I always say that potty training is five percent ability to get their clothes on and off, five percent ability to go pee or poop in the potty and NINETY percent being able to identify when they have to go and telling the adult BEFORE they have to go.

Another misconception is that if a child tells you that they have peed or pooped in their diaper that it’s a sign that they are ready to train. I haven’t seen ANY correlation to a child’s awareness AFTER they have gone to their ability to recognize and act BEFORE they have to go.

Some things we do to get kids ready to train:
1) We start reading potty books and talking about going potty in the big girl or big boy potty during changing.
2) We have them sit on the potty during natural transition times (before and after meals, before and after naps, and diaper changes)
3) We practice with them getting their pants up and down on their own and hand washing.
4) We will supervise them and watch for signs that they have to go or are going and get them off to the potty.
5) We keep close communication with the parents about any indicators suggesting the child is ready.

Some things we don’t do:
We do not put kids on a potty schedule where they go every half hour or hour. It’s very time consuming with little to no benefit. From experience we have seen this cause many problems with children not being able to hold much urine and having to constantly go to the potty further along down the line. They are able to settle down at nap because once they relax and have a little bit of pee they have to get up and go. They can’t do walks because they can’t make it very long without having to come back to potty. The day pretty much centers around the potty which just isn’t realistic in this setting.
We don’t limit food or drinks to only be given at certain times. We maintain the same food and snack schedule during training.
We don’t clean out poopy underwear. We will bag pee soaked underwear and return it to the parent at the end of the day but we will not do this with soiled underwear. We must dispose of that immediately into the garbage. We don’t do laundry of any soaked or soaked or soiled clothes. They are bagged, put outside, and returned to the parents at the end of the day.

Some helpful hints to help you at home:
There are some easy daily things you can do at home that will really help your child’s progression. Some of these may sound silly but trust the ole Fat Nan… they REALLY work.

1) Be cheery about the potty. A happy experience each time they are on the potty will translate into quick training at home.
2) If there are two adults in the house have each adult “ask” the other adult if he/she can go to the potty at least four or five times a day. Your child seeing and hearing you “ask” if you can go will get the idea in their head that they need to do that too.
3) Praise the child on success for every step of the process but do not overdo it. You don’t want them trying to do the potty thing fifty times a day to get your attention or get rewarded. A “way to go” or a “thumbs up” and big smile will let them know you are proud. We use the phrase “you go potty like the BIG boys/girls do!!!! They love the idea of being BIG.
4) Bribery can be a good thing. Use stickers or small treats (like gummies, jelly beans, teddy grahams) ONLY after potty success. Have the child give the same treat to everyone around him that can have the treat. Passing a treat for his success will make the child happier that getting the treat himself. Every person receiving the prize says “Good job little buddy… you go potty like the big boys do”.
5) Let the child in the bathroom with you when you are going potty. This is really important for the same sex parent. Let them see how it works and you washing up afterwards.
6) Don’t let them play toilet paper. If they are infatuated with toilet paper give them a couple of generic cheapo rolls to play around with in the house to get it out of their system.
7) No punishment or consternation for accidents. Just talk to them about them needing to ask to go to the potty next time. We say “next time you will go potty like the BIG boys do… okay?!!”
8 ) If you see them mid way trying to poop or pee scurry them off to the potty to finish up.
9) Give your child three or four minutes to get the job done. It shouldn’t take more than a few minutes. Don’t let it turn into an attention seeking time where the child gets you to one to one them. It’s only about going potty. If they don’t go in a reasonable time tell them it’s time to get off and we will try again another time.
10) Don’t allow potty time to be a stall tactic to avoid doing something the child doesn’t want to do. We see this here at toy pick up and nap time. Some kids will claim they have to go potty to avoid having to go to bed. If you see a pattern of avoidance have the child do the potty a little bit before you want them to do whatever they are avoiding so it doesn’t interfere.
11) I don’t encourage any toys or books during the training time. It really can backfire on you. Potty time will quickly turn into one to one attention and play time for the child. After a child has been trained for a few months you can add a book for them to look at if they are having a hard time going poop.
12) Keep attention and interaction during potty time to a bare minimum. If your child is generally doinking around during the time he/she is sitting on the potty then turn away from them and keep the eye contact down. Keep the atmosphere calm and focused.
13) We train boys sitting down first. We switch them to standing up when they are tall enough to reach over the seat and adept enough to aim.
14) Be careful of public automatic flushing toilets. The noise of the flushing will scare them. If you bring a little post it note with you when you go out you can put it over the sensor so the toilet doesn’t automatically flush right when your child gets off of it.
15) Have fun. Stay cool. It will all work out.

Please don’t expect the same performance here as at home:
I’ve seen both ends of the spectrum with kids ability to be “trained” here and not at home and vice versa. I’ve had kids who have been successful at home and are unable to do it here for a number of reasons:
1) Kids are not trained at home to tell the parents they have to go BEFORE they have to go but rather are allowed free access unsupervised to the bathroom in their home. Again, here they must tell us BEFORE. They can’t leave the playroom without an adult and go into the bathroom without supervision.
2) There are many more distractions here with a larger group of kids, toys, and bustling activities.
3) They need one to one attention throughout the day in order to keep up with the toileting. Here we have multi-level aged children who have various needs and supervision requirements. We can’t focus on one child but must divide our attention with all the kids. This is another reason your child must tell us he/she has to go. They need to bring it to OUR attention. We can’t focus only on them to pick up cues, sign language, or specific behaviors to tell us it is time.
4) Parents are putting the child on the potty in small time increments. We don’t do this here so the child will wet themselves many times throughout the day if this is being done at home.
5) Parents are over exaggerating and sometimes purposefully deceiving the child care provider into believing the child is completely trained at home so they can avoid bringing diapers. There is also an element of the parent population who believe that early training is a sign of giftedness and want their children to be advanced. Potty training has nothing to do with giftedness regardless of the age of training.

We have also had kids who are successful here but will not do it at home. This can happen if:
1) The child is on the go a lot in the evenings and weekends making it difficult for the parent to do toileting practice at home.
2) Children are with different caregivers on the weekend who don’t continue the practicing.
3) Parents want the training to be done at day care during the day and do diapers and pull-ups at home on the weekends.

We have had a number of children who train a full year at home before they train here or train here a full year before they train at home. It is best when it is done at the same time but don’t be worried if the child is successful only with you.

We don’t put children into underwear until they have been COMPLETELY accident free HERE for two full weeks.
This is an absolute non-negotiable policy. I have potty trained many children over the years and have found that once a child is successful for two full weeks HERE it is rare if not unheard of for them to have accidents thereafter. We haven’t had a potty training accident here in over five years. This is because this policy is strictly enforced.

The reason we have this policy is because over the years we are training many kids. We have to set up policies that maintain infection control standards for the child care and protect the carpet, furniture, and inventory of the day care. We a have to have higher standards than a parent has at home to avoid having to do frequent carpet and furniture cleaning and replacements. The entire day care portion of the home is carpeted.

Often when kids have accidents it isn’t discovered immediately and they end up wetting down their leg and soaking their socks. We are not literally keeping our eyes directly on just one child every second so it could go unnoticed. Once the child sits down or walks around a bit in the playroom you quickly have an entire room with urine soaked footsteps and big soaked spots from the child sitting. It only takes a few minutes of free playing to cover the room completely. The babies and toddlers play and lay directly on that carpet.

Once it’s discovered we have to have the entire room cleaned. Once urine gets into the carpet paid it is nearly impossible to clean it down to the pad with regular carpet cleaners. Having the carpet done professionally is very expensive and hard on the carpet.

When children soil their underwear it is a very big mess to clean up. Often the poop will soak thru their clothes and cause the same problems the pee accidents cause. It can require professional cleaning and takes more staff time to deal with then the cost of diapers for a week.

Naptime training:
Sometimes kids nap train right away when they are awake time trained. Most children are not able to do this and it is many months and sometimes years before they are nap trained. We require nap diapers until the child has slept through nap for one full month without a pee accident.

What to wear during training:
Children should wear easy on and off pants during training. We prefer sweat pant like bottoms until they are physically capable of doing snaps and buttons. Please don’t send them in anything that requires us to remove the top to get to the bottom. We don’t allow overalls, kid costumes, union suits, one piece jammies, or shirts with snaps at the crotch. Belts and suspenders are never allowed in the day care for safety reasons.
Diapers and pull-ups are okay for training. We do not use pull-ups until the child is at the one week mark without accidents. We do not do cloth diapers or underwear with plastic pants. If you have had great success at home we can do the training with the underwear and a pull-up over the underwear during the training. If the child has regular accidents in the underwear we will switch them back to regular diapers and try again at another time. We use regular diapers at nap time.
Finally, I have found that a number of kids are easily potty trained during long vacations and holiday breaks. The parents have the time to do the intense work and supervision. Parents can allow the child to be in underwear for many consecutive days. If they are successful at home they still must remain in diapers and be accident free for two weeks HERE. They can come in underwear with pull-ups when they return. That way they will have a protective layer over the underwear to protect the carpet should they revert back to accidents. I will let you know how they are doing every day.
Thanks and let me know if you have any questions or want to discuss it further. If it’s done at a time when they child is truly ready it should go very easily and quickly.

Kindergarten №59

Consultations

End |
Consultations |
Home

1 year 3 months-1 year 8 months – this is exactly the age when the child begins to ask for a potty. Adults should be attentive to the child, notice the time when he has a corresponding need, and put the child on the potty.

The sounds uttered at the same time are taken over by the child, who is already beginning to speak, and he often already makes himself aware of his need by running to the potty, sometimes sitting down on it with his pants buttoned up. You can not plant a child when he does not have a need for this, for example, if he woke up wet, you cannot hold the child on the potty, otherwise the connection between action, urge and result is interrupted. You should not forcibly plant a crying child so that he does not develop a negative attitude towards the potty.

It is necessary that the pot is comfortable in size for the child. The skill of neatness in a one and a half year old child is not yet strong, the changed living conditions, the child’s illness can destroy this skill.

The child should not be allowed to get used to diapers. If this is not unpleasant for him, the motive for striving for neatness disappears. Wet pants must be changed immediately, drawing the attention of the child to this. We can say with confidence that no threats, punishments, will help to achieve the goal, will not teach the child to be neat.

Should I put my child on the potty at night and wake him up to do this? It is good if the child sleeps all night, remaining dry. To do this, do not give him diuretic food at night; you can give something salty (a piece of herring). The child is put on the potty before going to bed and then no longer disturbed. A long restful sleep is necessary for the baby to restore his nervous forces. If the child turns in his sleep, groans, you have to put him on the pot, but this should be done calmly, if possible without turning on the light, without disturbing the child’s sleep.

How to potty train a child 2-3 years

If a child began to be taught in a timely manner to ask for a potty, then by the age of two, and more often and much earlier, he himself asks. But sometimes children even three years old, carried away by the game, upset or finding themselves in new unusual conditions, may not ask for a potty in time.

Often such a violation of urinary control is associated with increased nervousness of the child, but it also happens in perfectly healthy children. Sometimes such a violation is the result of the fact that the child was too often or incorrectly planted on the potty, unnecessarily woken up at night.

Most often, a child of two or three years of age, having wet his pants, is ashamed and very worried when he is scolded for this or even more so punished. But neither reproaches nor punishments usually help to accustom a child to neatness.

How, then, to educate children to control the need for natural administration? A child who knows how to ask should be dropped off only at his request and regardless of his request, always before going to bed and for a walk. A child who does not always still ask should be observed very carefully and if you notice any signs indicating that the child needs to sit on the potty, you should invite him to do so.

Great care must be taken when dropping children off at night, as this disturbs their sleep to some extent. Incorrect actions can permanently fix the child’s habit of asking for a potty at night. A child should not be dropped off at night if he protests, cries and does not fall asleep for a long time after, but you only need to carefully change wet linen.

The child should be planted at night, when he asks himself or if he sleeps restlessly. It is necessary to land very carefully, supporting the baby while he sits, as many children fall asleep on the potty.

To prevent nighttime urination, feed your child an hour and a half before bedtime, do not give a large amount of liquid before bedtime, and be sure to put the child on the potty just before going to bed.

Children who are systematically wet several times a day or at night should first of all be shown to a doctor, since this is often associated with a disease.

If the child is healthy, then it is necessary to show perseverance and patience in order to instill in him a strong habit of asking for a potty.

You can’t shame or even punish a child who himself understands that he needs to ask for a potty, and is very worried when he turns out to be wet. Most often this happens with children who are easily excitable, with an unstable nervous system.

Therefore, the first thing to do is to identify and eliminate the causes of the child’s arousal, if necessary, change the daily routine, increase the time spent in the air, take care of the child’s quieter games and activities. After consulting with a doctor, introduce water procedures. Every time before going to bed, you should remind the baby to ask for a potty if necessary.

A child whose habit of neatness has not yet been fixed should be calmly offered several times during the day, but not more often than after one and a half to two hours, to sit on the potty. If the child categorically refuses, then one should not insist on doing this without fail now, but suggest that he, when he needs it, ask.

The main thing is not to create unnecessary nervousness around the child’s lack, to show patience. Reproaches and punishments only fix the child’s attention on his shortcoming and create nervous tension, in which he is even more unable to control his behavior. Therefore, it is necessary to use other techniques that instill confidence in the child, the desire to follow the instructions of the elders. Whenever a child, who does not always ask, does it on time, he should be praised: “Here, well done, he asked himself. When you need more, be sure to tell me. I’ll put you on the potty, and your pants will be dry. If the child turns out to be wet and experiences this, then you need to encourage him: “Nothing, nothing, you know how to ask and next time you will have time to ask. Now I’ll change you.”

Calm, patient behavior of parents and compliance with these measures will give positive results after a while.

Home |
Consultations |
Home

How to potty train a child

What age to start

The most suitable age for potty training a child is from 1.5 years.

Only after one year the child begins to feel the filling of the rectum, and closer to two years – the bladder. By this time, he has matured conscious, full control over the excretory processes. By 2–3 years, defecation becomes conscious, strong-willed, controlled.

Early potty training (during the first year of life) has long been recognized as wrong, because it does not take into account either the psychological readiness or the physical maturation of the baby. It is based on the formation of conditioned reflexes and does not develop a conscious skill. Thus, an incorrect chain of actions is created: parents encourage the child to empty the bladder, for this they use the sounds of murmuring water or certain words, after which the expected action occurs.

The skill acquired in this way is unstable and can easily be lost as a result of any stress (change of residence, quarrels of parents, admission to kindergarten). In addition, early learning is based on the pressure of adults, which in the future can cause stress in the child, psychosomatic and neurotic diseases, for example, logoneurosis, nervous tic, enuresis, encopresis, overactive bladder.

How to tell if a child is ready to be taught

There are signs indicating that the child is psychologically and physically ready to learn a new skill:

• the presence of a bowel movement – it occurs at about the same time of day;
• urination no more than once every 2 hours – i. e. the diaper must remain dry for at least 2 hours;
• the child knows and shows body parts and various items of clothing, knows and understands the meaning of words related to the toilet, feels discomfort and shows negative emotions when he is in a dirty diaper;
• the child has a desire to imitate adults;
• he tries to dress himself;
• shows interest in the toilet;
• age over 1.5 years.

If all these criteria are met, then we can say that potty training will be as simple and easy as possible for both mother and baby.

How to start teaching

Buying a potty. It should be purchased in advance – so that it becomes a familiar item in the house. You can choose a potty in the store together with your child.

It is better to opt for an ordinary pot without lights and musical accompaniment. A pot from which applause comes can frighten, and a luminous one will sooner or later become a toy.

The potty should be comfortable, stable, anatomically shaped: for boys, oval with a ledge in front, for girls, round is better.

There is a pot – therefore, it is necessary to explain what it is for. A favorite toy will help with this: we put a bear or a favorite doll on a pot and tell the child what he (she) is doing, pronounce the entire sequence of actions.

You can look at books and pictures on the topic together, but you need to comment on the actions of the depicted characters. We immediately explain to the child that “going to the potty” is a very personal action, so you should not install it in the center of the room and invite relatives to admire the contents.

We draw the attention of the child to the fact that when one of the parents wants to go to the toilet, they do not experience any embarrassment or embarrassment. He will see that this situation is natural for them, and he will also perceive it.

We observe the child’s behavior: as soon as there are signs that he wants to go to the toilet (the child is quiet, hidden, tense, etc.), we put him on the potty. If, at the same time, the child actively resists, screams, arches, we do not force, but postpone the accustoming for 2-3 weeks.

During this period, we put on a minimum of clothes so that it is easy to take off, so it is better to potty train in the warm season.

We do not scold the child if he soils his pants or the floor. We ask him to clean up after himself, put the soiled clothes in the washing machine. Thus, we form awareness and the ability to plan activities related to the toilet.

What tricks and techniques can be used

There are operant techniques that are based on positive reinforcement of the desired skills. It is the reaction to defecation in the proper environment that should be reinforced, and not the absence of such a reaction in inappropriate conditions (otherwise constipation cannot be avoided).

To model behavior, you can reward the child (use flags, stars, praise, hugs, etc.) – first for sitting in the toilet, then for defecation. One of the implementation options for such a technique is line of positive reinforcement . We stick a ruler near the pot (you can make it yourself from paper), on which after each act of defecation we stick any sticker (the child can choose it in the store). At the end of the line, we depict a reward, for example, some small toy that the child would like to receive (the encouragement does not have to be material). We draw the attention of other relatives to the ruler, emphasizing the importance of the fact that the child copes on his own. Thus, he receives recognition from significant adults.

To potty train a child, we use different games that symbolize the act of defecation and urination. For example, loading and unloading toy cars . At one end of the room, the child loads various small objects (balls, cubes, toys) into a car with a body. He must take them to another part of the room (to the “shop” or “to the dacha”), not far from the toilet, slowly unload and fold beautifully. During the game, we praise the child for the fact that he brought everything well, did not lose it on the road and beautifully folded it in the right place.

Unconsciously, such a process is associated with going to the toilet and “unloading” the body.

You can use the toy train with a train, cars, a barrier and an arrival terminal also located next to the toilet. The child loads the cars with various small toys, which the train carries to the station. There he stops, and after the checkpoint he unloads what he has brought. We praise him for his skillful unloading. Such games with the transportation of materials can be repeated several times.

Balloon game: Fill a regular balloon with peas or small balloons. We come up with a plot in which peas, for some reason, should fall out of the ball. After a few peas fall out, we praise the child.

To make bowel movements regular, we set a certain time for visiting the toilet. We make a calendar so that the child has a visual reinforcement of his activity. We agree with him on the number of visits to the toilet during the day, agreed, for example, with the time of eating, other regime moments. In this case, you can offer the child to make a schedule in pictures (and preferably in photographs). We photograph the child during the day for various activities, but in a strict sequence: eating, playing, walking, sleeping, etc. Then we discuss with him: “You had breakfast, played, now you will sit on the potty for 5 minutes and you can play more.” At the same time, we use visual reinforcement of the passage of time – for example, an hourglass (1, 3, 5 minutes). A visual schedule can be made on a sticky basis so that after each action performed, the child can stick a certain thematic picture – this also serves as a reinforcement.

The child performs all actions together with an adult. Depending on his age, level of development and therapeutic motivation, potty training should be pre-structured and provide for assistance. For example, you may need to teach your child how to clean up after a spontaneous bowel movement. At the same time, he may need help in changing clothes, transferring dirty laundry to a suitable place and finally putting himself in order.