Kindness and: 60 Kindness Quotes That Will Stay With You

Опубликовано: January 17, 2023 в 2:02 am

Автор: alexxlab

Категории: Miscellaneous

60 Kindness Quotes That Will Stay With You

Spread the love with inspirational kindness quotes from some of the most influential figures throughout history.

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Kindness quotes

The world can always use more stories of kindness. If you need more compassion in your life or want to spread it to those around you with some random acts of kindness, read through and share these kindness quotes. Desmond Tutu, Maya Angelou, Princess Diana, and many more said it best in these “be kind” quotes. If these kindness quotes aren’t enough for you, get motivated by these uplifting quotes, laugh at these kindness memes, and get little ones involved in these acts of kindness for kids.

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“You cannot do kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

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“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” —The 14th Dalai Lama. Don’t forget to browse through these body-positive quotes to celebrate the skin you’re in.

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“A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve.” —Joseph Joubert

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“Compassion isn’t about solutions. It’s about giving all the love that you’ve got.” —Cheryl Strayed. Check out these “dream big” quotes that’ll motivate you right now.

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“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.” —Princess Diana. This has to be one of Princess Diana’s most inspiring quotes.

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“Remember, there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.” —Scott Adams

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“I think probably kindness is my number one attribute in a human being. I’ll put it before any of the things like courage or bravery or generosity or anything else.” —Roald Dahl. Don’t miss these best friend quotes you’ll want to share with your bestie ASAP.

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“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” —Mother Teresa. Check out more of the best quotes from famous people you certainly won’t forget.

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“Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.” —Barbara De Angelis

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“What we all have in common is an appreciation of kindness and compassion; all the religions have this. Love. We all lean towards love.” —Richard Gere

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“For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For beautiful hair, let a child run his fingers through it once a day. For poise, walk with the knowledge that you will never walk alone.” —Sam Levenson

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“Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people.” —Franklin D. Roosevelt. Check out these small acts of kindness that’ll instantly brighten someone’s day.

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“That is what compassion does. It challenges our assumptions, our sense of self-limitation, worthlessness, of not having a place in the world, our feelings of loneliness and estrangement. These are narrow, constrictive states of mind. As we develop compassion, our hearts open.” —Sharon Salzberg

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“Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind.” —Eric Hoffer

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“When you callously ignore the suffering of others, you lose the capacity to share their happiness, too.” —Albert Schweitzer

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“Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.” —Anne Herbert

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“A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal.” —Steve Maraboli

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“Go and love someone exactly as they are. And then watch how quickly they transform into the greatest, truest version of themselves. When one feels seen and appreciated in their own essence, one is instantly empowered.” —Wes Angelozzi

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“What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?” —Jean-Jacques Rousseau

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“Always be a little kinder than necessary.” —James M. Barrie

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“A kind word is like a spring day.” —Russian proverb

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“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” —Margaret Mead

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“Kindness is the golden chain by which society is bound together.” —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. That’s why everyone needs to read these “be kind” quotes.

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“Kindness is the only service that will stand the storm of life and not wash out. It will wear well and will be remembered long after the prism of politeness or the complexion of courtesy has faded away.” —Abraham Lincoln. For even more inspiration, read up on the most powerful quotes about life.

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“Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.” —Desmond Tutu

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“To err on the side of kindness is seldom an error.” —Liz Armbruster

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“You can cultivate mercy when you extend acts of compassion and kindness to yourself and to other people.” —Bree Miller

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“My wish for you is that you continue. Continue to be who and how you are, to astonish a mean world with your acts of kindness. Continue to allow humor to lighten the burden of your tender heart.” —Maya Angelou. Here are more Maya Angelou quotes that will uplift and inspire you.

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“Kindness is an electrical spark of life that runs through all kingdoms and has a reciprocal action when shown to others.” —Joe Hayes

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“It is the characteristic of the magnanimous man to ask no favor but to be ready to do kindness to others.” —Aristotle

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“Do things for people not because of who they are or what they do in return, but because of who you are.” —Harold S. Kushner

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“Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.” —Jackie Chan

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“Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change.” —Bob Kerrey

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“Because that’s what kindness is. It’s not doing something for someone else because they can’t, but because you can.” —Andrew Iskander

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“Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received. Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling. Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse.” —Henry van Dyke

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“Kindness begins with the understanding that we all struggle.” —Charles Glassman

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“The words of kindness are more healing to a drooping heart than balm or honey.” —Sarah Fielding

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“Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness.” —Lucius Annaeus Seneca

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“To practice five things under all circumstances constitutes perfect virtue; these five are gravity, generosity of soul, sincerity, earnestness, and kindness.” —Confucius

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“Kindness and politeness are not overrated at all. They’re underused.” —Tommy Lee Jones

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“You can accomplish by kindness what you cannot by force.” —Publilius Syrus

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“Simple kindness may be the most vital key to the riddle of how human beings can live with each other in peace and care properly for this planet we all share. ” —Bo Lozoff

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“When words are both true and kind, they can change the world.” —Buddha

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“Kindness is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends. It softens hearts and molds relationships that can last lifetimes.” —Joseph B. Wirthlin

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“Kindness is the light that dissolves all walls between souls, families, and nations.” —Paramahansa Yogananda. Make sure to write down some of these kindness quotes to refer back to later.

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“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” —Aesop

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“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. ” —Leo Buscaglia

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“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” —Mark Twain

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“A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.” —Amelia Earhart

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“To kindness and love, the things we need most.” —The Grinch

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“How do we change the world? One random act of kindness at a time.” —Morgan Freeman

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“When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.” —Abraham Joshua Heschel

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“Never look down on anybody unless you’re helping them up.” —Jesse Jackson

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“A great man shows his greatness by the way he treats little men.” —Thomas Carlyle

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“Kind words do not cost much. Yet they accomplish much.” —Blaise Pascal

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“The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the greatest intention.” —Kahlil Gibran

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“A little thought and a little kindness are often worth more than a great deal of money.” —John Ruskin

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“Kindness gives birth to kindness.” —Sophocles

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“Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.” —Theodore Isaac Rubin

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“Kindness is always fashionable, and always welcome.” —Amelia Barr. Now that you’ve read these kindness quotes, check out courage quotes that will inspire you to face your fears.

Originally Published: February 07, 2022

Marissa Laliberte

Marissa Laliberte-Simonian is a London-based associate editor with the global promotions team at WebMD’s Medscape.com and was previously a staff writer for Reader’s Digest. Her work has also appeared in Business Insider, Parents magazine, CreakyJoints, and the Baltimore Sun. You can find her on Instagram @marissasimonian.

The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation

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what is it and how to bring it up in yourself?

Essays
Free topic
Human kindness

What is “human kindness”? Kindness is a feature inherent only to people, based on mentality, upbringing, education and environment. It can manifest itself in different ways: for some it is a small act of kindness, for others it is good intentions towards the whole society, for others it is all together. There is no single definition for this concept.

From a psychological point of view, “kindness” is a personal quality due to which a person forgets about the self-centered beginning and performs selfless acts: shows care, attention, support. A kind person is sympathetic and kind-hearted, he tries to make the world a better place, to help others, sometimes even to the detriment of personal interests. In addition, psychologists say that kindness is brought up from childhood, it contributes to the successful socialization of the child.

However, there is never an absolute good, just as there is never an absolute evil. Man is by nature multifaceted, and it often happens that, being a villain in one situation, he is a benefactor in another. Perhaps the most basic traits of kind people are good intentions, a willingness to give something and ask for nothing in return. When we are faced with a difficult situation, we expect help, sympathy, kindness from those around us. In each of the epochs of human life, kindness was valued as an irreplaceable quality.

In addition, kindness can be sincere, or it can be false due to ulterior motives. For example, a person can help out of sympathy and compassion, or maybe for the sake of personal reputation and raising public opinion about his own personality. There may be a different number of reasons, it is only important to distinguish the first from the second and make the right choice for yourself.

From the point of view of psychology, it is also important to distinguish between active and passive kindness. Active manifests itself when the essence of a person tells him not to commit evil deeds, while at the same time forcing him to commit good ones. Passive is manifested in indifference: a person will not do anything bad, but he will not do anything good either. Neither one nor the other is good, so psychologists also distinguish a third type of kindness – fighting. You have to do as you want to be treated. This is the basic postulate of religions, true from the point of view of the human psyche and morality.

To be a kind person, one must be able to listen to other people’s requests, be attentive to trifles. There is no need to forcefully try to become “kind”, to impose it on others, because the desire must come from the heart. First of all, it is important to understand the sincerity of one’s own feelings, to show concern for those who need it, to help those who need help, to be honest and open.

Discourse on Human Kindness

In the age of modern technology, kindness has become a quality that a person can rarely display. So what is kindness and when should it be shown? Kindness is the quality of a person, thanks to which he can, and most importantly, wants to do good deeds or help others. Possessing this quality, a person wants to show care and love for the people around him. But in order to do good, a person must possess many other qualities and skills, for example, respect and responsiveness, as well as the ability to put oneself in the place of another, understanding what he experiences and feels. But in our time, this and other similar qualities, unfortunately, not all people possess. Indeed, now the priority for many people is their own person, which does not allow a person to pay attention to others. Also, do not think that you will receive something in return for good deeds, because kindness lies in doing good deeds disinterestedly, that is, without hoping to receive anything as a reward. But if you still think that in return for a service you will also receive a service, then this cannot be called kindness.

Nikolai Mikhailovich Karamzin’s Poor Liza is a good example of selfless kindness. In this story, the main character loved her mother, surrounded her with care, and really wanted to help her financially, selling flowers daily in the city. Later, Lisa met a nobleman whom she loved so much that she did everything for him and in order to spend more time with him. But after Erast lost interest in Lisa, she realized how stupid she was that she decided to commit suicide. But even before her death, she does not forget about her mother and gives her the money of the person who betrayed her. The heroine was so kind and trusting that she forgot that people can easily take advantage of her kindness. It seems to me that many people should learn from Lisa such kindness and openness, not forgetting about the problems that excessive and careless goodwill can lead to.

I believe that kindness is the best positive quality a person should have. The manifestation of this quality should be in those cases when a person considers it necessary, and not when he hopes to receive something in return. People should cultivate kindness in themselves from early childhood, and parents should help them in this. After all, who, if not parents, will tell us to donate some money to the homeless or help our grandmother cross the road.

What is kindness?

Kindness is a spiritual quality of a person, which manifests itself in altruism, tolerance, responsiveness, mercy, the desire to please people: to do things that cause joy, gratitude and other positive emotions. But despite its apparent simplicity, this concept is considered difficult to define. KINDNESS is a much more capacious word, containing so much lightness and warmth that one would like to expand the definition.

Kindness is an exclusively moral concept . And only the moral makes a man a man. This is one of the oldest moral categories, the most important talent that was valued more than others by people at different times. This is the highest good, an absolute virtue that brings us closer to the ideal.

An important criterion for kindness is the absence of self-interest . When it is real, it is done without fuss and noise, it is not put on display, it does not require services or gratitude, public approval in return. Kindness has one unique ability: the more we give to others, the more it becomes. It is never in excess, it can be large or small, imperceptible at first glance. But sometimes it returns in multiplied quantities, causing a surge of the brightest and most amazing emotions.

Today there is not enough active, active kindness . Doing good is common to many. But the expression “good deeds” is so commonplace that people have ceased to think about its true meaning. In a broad sense, these are good deeds, helping other people (or not people) coming from the heart, an expression of altruism, humanity, attention. But a good deed is not a show. When a person talks about the good he has done, he benefits from it and thereby significantly reduces its value.

But this does not mean that good deeds do not deserve any reward. For all the disinterestedness of the act, ingratitude causes at least bewilderment. And sometimes – frankly jars. It is not for nothing that ingratitude is called the daughter of pride and is considered one of the greatest sins. Kindness is a moral category, which means that the reward for it should be moral. Gratitude is expressed in different ways. Most of the time it’s just a simple “thank you”. Sometimes – a return service, sometimes – a medal “for good deeds. ”

« Expressing gratitude, we must remember that the highest manifestation of gratitude is not words, but actions.» (J. Kennedy).

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Option 4

In today’s world, you can often meet a kind person. He can meet us just on the street, he can meet us in public transport, giving us a seat. Can help us with heavy bags, can move an old grandmother across the street.

So what is kindness? There are many proverbs and sayings about kindness, thus it is included in the basis of how to be and how to act in our lives. Our grandmothers and mothers were brought up on these proverbs, and now our parents are educating us on their examples. Parents teach us from childhood to be kind, take care of others. Our care should be shown not only to people, but to all life on earth. It can be a dog, a cat, a bird, as well as nature itself.

Why do we need kindness? And we need it to make the world brighter, kinder, brighter. I would like to note that kindness does not live in every person. A kind person seeks to do a good deed for another person. The most important criteria in this, the absence of self-interest. That is, a person, doing a good deed, does it for free, does not expect any benefit from this deed.

The concepts of kindness and generosity stand next to each other, but, despite this, they are different. Both of these words are associated with a person as something positive, decent. But there really is a difference. The very word generosity suggests that a person with this quality has an open great soul. People with this quality are ready to come to the rescue in difficult times, sacrificing a lot, and sometimes themselves, in order to do a good deed. Just like kindness, generosity has selflessness. A generous person has responsiveness and kindness, he is able to help all people who find themselves in a difficult life situation. Kindness by nature shows up more often in our ordinary lives than generosity. This is justified by the fact that everyone can be a kind person and kindness is not equated with a heroic deed. Not everyone has generosity. Generosity is equated with heroic deeds, a person sacrificing himself, extending a helping hand. Not everyone is capable of such moral feats. The manifestation of generosity causes a feeling of delight and admiration in people. This is a sign of nobility and a manifestation of humanity.

The spiritual qualities of kindness and generosity stand side by side, but nowadays people know how to distinguish between them. In everyday life, you need to be a kind person, develop these character traits in yourself, so we will make this world a little kinder, brighter and happier. If we talk about kindness, we can make ourselves kinder, then this cannot be said about generosity. A generous person needs to be born. Magnanimous people are heroes who, sacrificing themselves, go to exploits.

Holidays named after kindness.

On November 13, 1998, World Kindness Day was established. Japan became the organizer of the World Movement for Kindness. Today, the tradition has taken root in 28 states, but every year the list of countries of celebration is replenished with new participants. The key idea promoted by the community is that kindness is available to everyone and has the ability to unite the whole world. In addition, the manifestation of kindness is useful to the person himself.

Members of the movement believe that it is easy to do good, and in any case it will return a hundredfold to a person. On this Day, it is customary to give flowers to all people, hold flash mobs and open lessons in schools. The symbol of the organization is an open heart.

Every year on February 17, an unofficial holiday is celebrated – the Day of spontaneous acts of kindness. It was initiated by US charities in the 2000s, but today the Day has gained worldwide popularity. The organizers call to help others, regardless of their religion, financial status and place of residence.

How to cultivate kindness?

Kindness, altruism, responsiveness are inherent in us from birth. Darwin also said that mutual assistance helped our ancestors to survive. But at the beginning of the 20th century, economists and philosophers actively promoted the “virtue of selfishness.” But in the face of globalization, people increasingly feel that the notorious individualism does not bring happiness. In addition to the fact that kindness is genetically inherent in a person, it can and should be brought up at any age.

How to cultivate kindness in a child?

Kindness is in fashion today – people talk about it online, write about it in textbooks, hold open lessons. But education does not end with lessons alone, and parents often support “penetrating” qualities in a child – perseverance, the ability to stand up for themselves, to convince them of their own rightness. Of course, these qualities will come in handy in life, but it is equally important to teach a child to be kind, open, sympathetic, sympathetic.

There are things that cannot be injected or forced. They can only be conveyed by personal example. Real kindness without future self-interest lives where there is love and trust. For parents, we have collected 10 tips from psychologists and educators on how not to raise a child angry at the whole world:

Teach children to trust – first their parents, then themselves, then the world.
Explain the power of words – tell that a rude word hurts another, but words of gratitude will give a person strength.
Do not intimidate, do not respond with aggression to aggression – reciprocal anger frightens the child, does not teach him alternative behavior.
Tell a story from personal experience – you can’t force people to make friends, but you can use an example to explain the reason for another person’s actions.
Do not take away toys or things that are dear to him – this will create a feeling of insecurity, mistrust.
Learn to listen to your own feelings – the ability to distinguish emotions will help not only in kindness, but also in the process of socialization.
Tell them that “otherness” is not a reason to reject a person – teach them how to interact with peers with disabilities, autistic children, sunny children.
Maintain Innate Kindness – Raise your child carefully and gently, emphasizing harmony over obedience.
Teach empathy, not pity – talk about the pain of animals, the sorrows of other people, teach them to share with those who need it.
Just love – a person who grew up with a feeling of love will never become bitter and live a happy life.

« Kindness is a cultivated feeling.» (Z. Gerdt).

How to become kinder yourself?

It has been scientifically proven that when we help others, we ourselves become happier. Kindness can be expressed in many ways and manifested in simple things: a smile, words of encouragement, a sincere compliment. Let’s talk about actions that will help to do good to people and get their portion of satisfaction.

Learn kindness from others . Think about how the good-hearted acts of others have made your life better and what you experienced in doing so. Try to repeat this act from the bottom of your heart.
Become a volunteer . Find out about volunteer organizations in your city: animal shelters, environmental garbage collection movements, organizing committees for organizing sports, cultural or social events.
Do small good deeds . Kindness and love can be invested even in insignificant actions: buy something from your grandmother in the market, leave a positive review in your favorite cafe, make a sincere compliment to the cashier in the supermarket.
Not litter
. Cleaning up after yourself after a picnic, throwing garbage in the trash – this is not enough today. To save the ecosystem and cause less harm to nature, switch to reusable cloth bags, refuse disposable tableware, try to buy products in one large package instead of several small ones.
Be kind to everyone, not just those in need . This refers to kindness directed towards people emotionally close to us: parents, children, compatriots who also live in another country.
Smile more . A smile of courtesy can be a signal of goodwill and friendliness to those around you. Smiling as a greeting can help bring us closer, close the distance, and demonstrate our innate receptivity to kindness.
Develop friendliness and sociability . One desire to become kind is not enough, because these qualities are read on a subconscious level. It is enough to make a little effort to be attentive to people, ask them about their affairs, sympathize with failures and show interest.

Conclusions:

Kindness is the highest virtue and the most important virtue in the world, which is considered the main indicator of human morality.
Good deeds are determined not by pragmatic consequences, but by moral categories.
Not ostentatious, but selfless kindness returns like an echo.
Ways to spread good are unpredictable and varied. Daily deeds and official holidays that promote goodness are essential.
Helping by force, we force. So imposed good deeds more often strain than cause gratitude.
A random act of benevolence can improve, but it can break someone’s life. Therefore, it is better to help those who are waiting for it.

Take the test: introvert or extrovert?

what is it and how to bring it up in yourself?

Kindness is good for mental and physical health, scientists say. Indeed, when we do good deeds, we become happier. Unfortunately, good is more often done for the sake of something than just by itself. Is a deed considered good if it is done out of selfish motives? Is kindness a sign of weakness or strength? And when the imposed help turns into evil? How many people, so many answers. The article collected statements of famous people, advice from psychologists, teachers on how to cultivate kindness at any age.

What is kindness?

« Expressing gratitude, we must remember that the highest manifestation of gratitude is not words, but actions.» (J. Kennedy).

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Word and concept etymology.

At first glance, the meanings of the words “goodness” and “kindness” remained constant throughout the history of the Russian language. But in the dictionaries of the XVIII-XIX centuries “good” had several interpretations: moral – “all positive deeds” and material – “property, acquired belongings.” That is, good was associated with wealth, and wealthy people were considered good. Today, words are used only in a moral and ethical sense and refer to the moral sphere of life.

The word “good” is originally Russian, comes from the Proto-Slavic language, which existed until the 5th century BC. e. According to etymologists, the concept comes from the word “oak” and meant courageous, stable, strong. “Good” is the fifth letter of the ancient Slavic alphabet, which was not just a set of sounds, but a whole message to the Slavs.

The word “kindness” has no exact analogues in other languages, but this does not mean that philosophers have bypassed it in their writings. In ancient philosophy, the concept of kindness was part of the ethical and philosophical categories. At the same time, it was considered with the spiritual and spiritual needs of a person. Later, in the philosophy of the 16th-19th centuries, the understanding of kindness was reduced to benefit and benefit.

Kindness, kindness and virtue are the basic concepts of ethics . They are certainly close in sound and origin, but they mean different things. As you know, goodness is a sign of a stable balance of the world, there is never too much of it. But with kindness it is somewhat different – for her, the direction and true motives of the one who commits it are important. Virtue is the desire of a person to do good deeds, sometimes a one-time desire. Kindness is a constant category, it either exists or it does not exist.

What do religions say about kindness and kindness?

According to the Bible Good is one of the names of God and there is no good independent of God. Kindness is considered the fundamental criterion of humanity, and a person who does good is recognized as a true believer. But another question arises: if God is the source of good, then why did he create evil? Philosophers, theologians, religious figures argue about this. But perhaps the Christian theologian Gregory of Nyssa, who lived in the 4th century, spoke most profoundly of all: “Evil is a distance from good, but without evil, good is incomprehensible.” All Gospel wisdom is reflected in the letter of the Apostle Paul to the Romans, which ends with the words “. .. overcome evil with good.”
Islam calls to do good without waiting for approval. This means that in communication a person should avoid rudeness, insults, ugly words, anger. Kindness implies gentleness, condescension, teaches you to accept the opinions of other people and not try to convince them that you are right.
Buddhism teaches people to learn kindness gradually “The jug is filled drop by drop. So a wise person is gradually filled with goodness. Unlike other religions, Buddhism does not oppose good and evil, but emphasizes the importance of the balance of love and compassion: “… a good mind and a good heart must work together.” The spiritual leader of the followers of Tibetan Buddhism, the Dalai Lama XIV speaks at universities, meetings, public meetings and in all speeches talks about the meaning of kindness and compassion for human society.

“ I believe that the true religion is the Good Heart” (Dalai Lama XIV).

Holidays named after kindness.

When does kindness become superfluous?

We were taught from childhood: helping others is right. We have grown up and now we are in a hurry to do more good deeds. And we don’t think about whether it is necessary for another person. There is a great expression “Do good and kindness.” When we rush to help those who do not ask us, we only complicate the problem. After all, to solve any life problem, a person is given determination, willpower, courage to solve it. When we interfere with our good advice or deeds, we take away his initiative, deprive him of the opportunity to develop personal qualities.

4 examples from life when imposed kindness becomes unnatural:

Example 1. Persistent advice.

Advice is the easiest option for unsolicited help and an easy way to do good. They can be endured on the pages of magazines or in advertising, because no one will check the implementation of the recommendations. Another thing is friends or relatives. Especially those who, with age, have considered themselves to be sages, but do not have the slightest relation to this field of knowledge. Sometimes a voluntary “guardian” is so diligent in imposing his advice that the wards simply begin to avoid him.

Conclusion + owl m. Unsolicited advice in any form is annoying. Therefore, periodically try to cut yourself off in half a sentence. Or, for a change, ask the other person if they need a hint.

Example 2. I know it’s better this way.

While advice can be dealt with somehow, unsolicited favors are much more difficult. Volunteer tries “as best”, but it turns out “as always”. Poor quality assistance or the so-called “disservice” at best nullifies all efforts. At worst, it destroys relationships. In addition, the service makes the other feel indebted. This is even more annoying.

Output+advice . When doing something unsolicited for a person, remember: you invaded someone else’s personal space. Therefore, be prepared to receive the answer “Did we ask you?” or see irritation instead of gratitude.

Example 3. Hypercare.

A person who is taken care of beyond measure becomes infantile, lacking initiative, passive. He physically does not know how or does not want to take care of himself and lives according to the principle “others will decide everything.” These are spoiled relationships, where the “guardian” seems to be trying to help the other, but thereby humiliates and levels his desires, abilities, dreams. If the victim gets bored with the passive role, the relationship ends in a breakup. In another case, the ward remains an emotionally and mentally immature person for many years.

Output+advice . Watch for outbreaks of parental overprotection, even if it is a five-year-old child. Try to respect the personal boundaries of the other, reckon with his opinion, otherwise excessive care will suck in like a swamp.

Example 4. Emotional blackmail.

This technique is used by those who are sure that “all means are good” when they are dictated by good intentions. But a person whom they try to do good by threats and coercion only resists and gets angry. But the guardian wants the best. Therefore, the phrases are used: “I laid my life on you”, “I lived my life, I know how best”, “I told / warned”. But the attempt to control others through guilt only outwardly looks worthy. In fact, this is a manifestation of selfishness and a desire to “amuse” one’s ego.

Output+advice . If you want to establish a respectful relationship, it is better not to use forbidden tricks. Then you don’t have to spend your energy on unnecessary things, but direct your energy to what is really important.

Take the test: child, adult, parent

Help is really a very personal matter. It is important to understand the causes and consequences of your virtuous act. They are usually selfish. Sometimes this desire to appear wiser, in other cases – the expectation of praise, in the third – the desire to manipulate another person. But the concept of “abstract kindness” does not exist. Each has its own benefit, and sometimes the greatest benefit is to leave the other alone.

“… is what the deaf can hear and the blind can see” (Mark Twain).

How to cultivate kindness?

How to cultivate kindness in a child?

Teach children to trust – first their parents, then themselves, then the world.
Explain the power of words – tell that a rude word hurts another, but words of gratitude will give a person strength.
Do not intimidate, do not respond with aggression to aggression – reciprocal anger frightens the child, does not teach him alternative behavior.
Tell a story from personal experience – you can’t force people to make friends, but you can use an example to explain the reason for another person’s actions.
Do not take away toys or things that are dear to him – this will give rise to a feeling of insecurity, distrust.
Learn to listen to your own feelings – the ability to distinguish emotions will help not only in kindness, but also in the process of socialization.
Tell them that “otherness” is not a reason to reject a person – teach them how to interact with peers with disabilities, autistic children, sunny children.
Maintain Innate Kindness – Raise your child carefully and gently, emphasizing harmony over obedience.
Teach empathy, not pity – talk about the pain of animals, the sorrows of other people, teach to share with those who need it.
Just love – a person who grew up with a feeling of love will never become embittered and live a happy life.

« Kindness is a cultivated feeling.» (Z. Gerdt).

How to become kinder yourself?

Learn kindness from others . Think about how the good-hearted acts of others have made your life better and what you experienced in doing so. Try to repeat this act from the bottom of your heart.
Become a volunteer . Find out about volunteer organizations in your city: animal shelters, environmental garbage collection movements, organizing committees for organizing sports, cultural or social events.
Do small good deeds . Kindness and love can be invested even in insignificant actions: buy something from your grandmother in the market, leave a positive review in your favorite cafe, make a sincere compliment to the cashier in the supermarket.
Not litter . Cleaning up after yourself after a picnic, throwing garbage in the trash – this is not enough today. To save the ecosystem and cause less harm to nature, switch to reusable cloth bags, refuse disposable tableware, try to buy products in one large package instead of several small ones.
Be kind to everyone, not just those in need . This refers to kindness directed towards people emotionally close to us: parents, children, compatriots who also live in another country.
Smile more . A smile of courtesy can be a signal of goodwill and friendliness to those around you. Smiling as a greeting can help bring us closer, close the distance, and demonstrate our innate receptivity to kindness.
Develop friendliness and sociability . One desire to become kind is not enough, because these qualities are read on a subconscious level. It is enough to make a little effort to be attentive to people, ask them about their affairs, sympathize with failures and show interest.