Kid at daycare: Brianna Dunkin-Funk picks up wrong kid from daycare, cops were called
3 things to expect when children start daycare…and tips to cope
Posted on by The Parentline
1. Frustration: Starting daycare is a big transition and it is normal for children to express many emotions as a result. Depending on the age of your child, you may see him or her get frustrated at the thought of separating from you and being in a different environment full of new faces. In this context of change and learning, with the limited emotional resources young children have, crying is expected and normal, although it can be heartbreaking for parents.
When going through transitions, children usually need some time to figure out their new setting and learn from their new experiences. In this case, when leaving their home or other familiar environment to start a new routine (at a new place), it will take some time to learn that caregivers will come back for them, that they can count on other grownups for love and support, and that they can play and share with other children.
Keep in mind that your child’s developmental level at the time of the transition to daycare may have to do with the amount of frustration or crying the child exhibits. For example, when children are between 7 months and 2 years old, they are increasingly understanding — sometimes grudgingly — that they are individuals and that they can be separated from their caregivers. As a result, children between these ages may experience separation anxiety, which tends to peak around 9 months and 18 months. In general, children with a more sensitive temperament may be slower to warm up to their new setting and could exhibit additional frustration, anxiety, or fear as a result – this is normal and it is especially important for caregivers and daycare professionals to support children with empathy and acceptance.
2. Parental stress/anxiety: Leaving one’s child at daycare for the first time can conjure many emotions for parents and caregivers. They may experience grief due to the separation, stress from changing the family’s routines, or negative emotions such as fear and worry that could be triggered by past experiences of separation. As much as parents want their child to transition to daycare successfully, it is important to give time to acknowledge the change and prepare for the possibility that it may take longer for the child and the parent/caregiver to settle into the new routine than anticipated. If possible, parents might consider taking some time off from work and other responsibilities to visit and tour the daycare with the child, meet with the daycare staff, and even volunteer for a morning or afternoon (if permitted) to get a feel for the environment.
3. Emotional safety at the daycare: Because children often express frustration and crying when starting daycare, it is especially important for caregivers to expect the daycare to provide an environment of emotional comfort and protection. In such environment, kids feel loved, accepted for who they are, respected, appreciated, heard, and safe. Beyond socializing children to the moral values of these qualities, having this environment is also crucial to children’s neurological, cognitive, and emotional development. Parents and caregivers are advised to look for daycares and schools where teachers and guardians provide comfort and above all emotional and physical safety. Additionally, parents may also have varying preferences for the way in which daycare professionals interact with their children – some may emphasize emotional expression, helping children name their emotions. At the minimum, it is reasonable for parents to expect daycare staff and teachers to express love and never use negative labels for children due to their behavior.
How can this transition be easier for the family?
The emotions and new stimulation resulting from the transition to daycare may cause some children to experience sleep regressions, throw more tantrums, and/or have changes in their eating habits. Here are some tips on how to make things a little more manageable during this time:
- Expect things to be a bit bumpy for a few days and try to avoid making too many other changes to your family’s routine at the same time.
- Daycare can initially be emotionally and physically tiring for your child. You might try letting your child nap longer, put them to bed early, and/or spend more time cuddling and playing with your child. Providing snacks that are high in protein and low in sugar will help them make it through the day with greater success.
- Physical expressions of love and speaking about the experience help to soothe your child’s nervous system and will allow them to better integrate and understand the change.
- For parents, seeking support from friends and family members who understand what you are going through can be especially useful. It may be also be helpful to establish a way to check-in regularly with the child’s new setting and teacher to receive updates on how the day is going. Building in self-care activities to one’s routine can also calm nerves and promote emotional well-being, which will ultimately strengthen the parent-child relationship.
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To the Parent Who Brought Their Sick Kid to Daycare and Got My Kid Sick
No matter how hard we try, everyone swaps germs with everyone else this time of year. Every time you drop your kiddos off at daycare and hear a cough, a sneeze, or someone clearing their throat (which, if we’re being honest, sounds like someone coughing up a lung), all you can think is, ew. Swiftly followed by, I really hope my little one doesn’t bring this home.
But that’s the nature of daycare. Kids sneeze at each other. They can be lax when it comes to washing their hands and sanitizing before they touch something or put it in their mouth. Now, being exposed to all of this can be beneficial in building up their immune system.
However, despite the benefits of immune building, many of us have problems when a sick child is sent to daycare. And we’re not talking sniffles that could be allergies or a dry cough that their pediatrician said was from post-nasal drip at night. We’re talking about the kid you know is unwell, but you give them Tylenol, hoping to drop their 102-degree fever long enough to drop them off and get to work before anyone notices (or the Tylenol wears off).
Most Parents Can Relate
Desperate times call for desperate measures, we know. But bringing your sick kid to daycare is never the answer. To begin with, when your little one doesn’t feel well, they need rest. They need relaxation. And they will not get either at daycare. You run the risk of them getting sicker or exacerbating their symptoms. On top of all that, you’re practically guaranteeing another parent and child the same fate. Spreading germs and viruses isn’t difficult, especially when you’re a two-foot, boogery, exhausted small person. How do I know? Well, I’m living it.
While I don’t know the source of contagion, I have my thoughts. My daughter has noticed many of her classmates coughing, sneezing, and falling asleep in class occasionally for the past few weeks, then disappearing for a time. To no one’s shock or surprise, it’s made the rounds, and both she and I are miserable and in agony – in the privacy of our own home. But here’s the thing: I don’t blame parents for getting sick. Cold and flu season extends from December to February, so it’s bound to happen. What matters is how you deal with the recovery process that gets my tissues in a bunch.
Kids Bring Those Germs Home
Oh, and you know that sickness isn’t limited to just your child and getting the rest of the class sick. They bring all those glorious, germy coughs and sky-high fevers home. What happens when your child gets little Sonny sick and Sonny’s grandma, who lives with him, has a compromised immune system? As far-fetched as it might sound, it’s a realistic scenario.
Bringing your sick kid to daycare creates a ripple effect beyond them. Unfortunately, kids and their families face a triple threat this school year. Cold and flu season is especially unbearable as Covid-19, the flu, and respiratory syncytial virus (RSV) continue spreading like wildfire. Chances are slim to none that your family will go the entire season without picking up something.
This was the exact conversation we had with our pediatrician during an annual check-up. In November, she said things were particularly worrisome already. And no, it hasn’t gotten any better. She told my daughters that even if they only had a cold, sniffles, or cough, it would be the right thing to do to wear a mask to school. To protect themselves as well as their classmates and teachers. So, we did. After her fever finally ceased and she had enough energy to return, she masked up. Did I get stares and looks that could kill when we both showed up this way? Yeah. But at least I knew I did the right thing by keeping her home when she was genuinely sick and taking precautions to keep her and everyone around her safe.
Sick Kids are a Challenge for All Parents
Having a sick kiddo is one of the most challenging parts of being a parent. You get stuck between the proverbial rock and a hard place. On the one hand, you feel terrible for them. You want to make them as comfortable as possible with cuddles, soup, and cozy PJs. But on the other hand, you still must work, whether outside or inside the home.
So, to the parent who brought their sick kid to daycare and got my kid sick—not to mention me—I get it. But I also implore you, on behalf of other kids, parents, teachers, and even your little one, next time, keep them home. Not only will they get better faster, but who doesn’t love a good movie marathon with warm drinks, comforting food, and lots of snuggles?
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Problems of a child in kindergarten and ways to solve them ✅ Blog IQsha.ru
Kindergarten is a very important period in a child’s life! For the first time, the baby is away from his parents for a long time, the environment and regime change, other guys appear with whom they need to share toys and attention. It is necessary to fulfill the requirements of the educators, because the group has its own rules and they must be followed.
All these innovations fall on the child at once, introducing him into a state of stress. Unfortunately, it will not be possible to avoid problems in kindergarten, because the process of adaptation is inevitable. But you can reduce the number of difficulties and successfully overcome them!
In this article we will analyze the difficulties children face in kindergarten and find ways to solve them.
When a child starts kindergarten, his life changes. Now he will spend a lot of time away from home, among other children and without parents. The child will have to adhere to the rules and routine of the day, and this requires effort.
To make the adaptation process easy, prepare your baby in advance: teach him to take care of himself, respect and obey adults, and communicate with other children.
Try a few months or at least weeks before going to preschool to start following the same daily routine. Let meals, walks and sleep be at the same hours as in the garden. So it will be much easier to get used to the rules and requirements of educators.
Problems with appetite
For many parents, the problem of the child’s appetite in kindergarten becomes the leading one. Adults get worried first, then kids start to worry too.
In fact, this difficulty is solved quite easily: if the child does not want to eat, then let him not eat! The main thing is to calmly convey this idea to the educators, as many of them encourage children to leave the plates empty. If a preschooler does not get enough food in the garden, he will always make up for it at home. And over time, looking at the appetizing chewing guys, the baby will slowly begin to eat for the company.
If the teacher is afraid that the child will affect other pupils with his appetite and refusal to eat, ask to move him closer to the adults so that he does not attract the attention of children. If you act in this way, then the problem of an empty plate will disappear over time.
What else always worries parents? Of course, frequent colds! Toddlers, who practically did not get sick before kindergarten, are starting to visit the pediatrician more and more often. And this, of course, worries adults.
Why is this happening? The fact is that in the group the guys “share” infections, and the stress from a sharp change in the usual regime and environment, as well as the need to somehow contact with peers, weakens the child’s immunity. Then the baby unconsciously understands that when he is sick, he stays at home with mom and dad, they take care of him and pay a lot of attention.
Therefore, an integrated approach is needed! The first is to strengthen the physical health of the baby, the second is to teach how to cope with stress in a different way, not through illness.
And if everything is quite clear with the first point (to temper, spend more time in the fresh air, monitor the child’s good nutrition and quality sleep), then the second is a little more difficult.
To get rid of stress or reduce it, you need to understand the cause of its occurrence. The baby may not develop relationships with caregivers or classmates, have problems with nutrition or sleep, following the regimen or requests of adults. Having identified the cause, try to eliminate it. If it does not come out on its own, be sure to seek help from a child psychologist! Do not pull and do not expect that everything will be decided by itself, as soon as the child grows up.
Remember, you can leave your baby at home for a while if you see that he is not psychologically ready to attend preschool.
Adaptation in kindergarten will be easier if the child already has self-care skills: eat, use the potty, wash and dry hands, dress. Yes, educators can help at some stage, but there is no time to do everything for the child. Even if there is a nanny in the group, it is not possible to spoon-feed and then wash and change all the children together with the teacher. Hence the constant fatigue and emotional burnout of teachers, which can worsen the emotional situation in the group.
Children’s problems in kindergarten also include psychological adjustment and difficulties with self-esteem.
At first it is very difficult for a child to be separated from his parents, especially his mother. Hence, self-doubt and fear, because the main protector and support of the baby is not around. Yes, the temperament of children is different, for some, parting with loved ones is not so painful. But no matter what the preschooler is: sociable or reserved, active or quiet, be sure to explain to him that he will not be left alone and his parents will always pick him up at the end of the working day.
It’s best to talk about specific actions, for example: “I’ll pick you up when you go out and sleep and eat.” This makes it easier for the child to navigate in time. Also, in the early days, try to be close to the group in order to be ready to immediately take the baby home.
Not all children know how to interact with each other, they cannot agree and play together. Hence frequent conflicts, possible isolation or aggression, tears and refusals to go to preschool. Therefore, it is so important to try to expand the crumbs’ social circle even before the garden! These can be group classes in developing studios, swimming, game centers. Even a playground can become a place to meet and connect with peers.
Don’t forget your own words! How do you behave when the child refuses to go to the garden, clings to your legs or arms and cries? Do you scold, say that nothing terrible will happen, thus not recognizing his experiences and feelings? Remember that your words affect his self-esteem, and therefore do not call the baby “crybaby”, “roaring cow” or something else, do not instill in him a sense of shame.
Be patient, be careful with your emotions, your son or daughter should feel loved and protected! And only parents can give it!
Contact of parents with teachers of the group
It seems that the child has adapted perfectly in kindergarten, got used to the regime, eats well, dresses himself, uses the potty, but the parents are not happy! Often the point is that adults have not found contact with the educator, do not accept each other because of the personal qualities of character or work methods.
You still have to interact, because moms and dads bring the baby to the garden and inevitably collide with the staff of the institution. Tensions and disagreements accumulate, and then result in a conflict, as a result of which children most often suffer.
We see two solutions – an open conversation (better in the presence of the director) or leaving for another group or kindergarten. Silence and denial of the conflict is not beneficial and always reflects on the child.
Do developmental exercises from Aikyusha
Tips for parents
P try to create a favorable and calm atmosphere in the family
Acceptance, love, attention to the child’s problems, as well as support and hugs will help to quickly go through a difficult period of adaptation and instill confidence in the baby.
Be attentive to the feelings and words of the baby
This approach will help you respond immediately to the problem, maintaining a trusting, warm and supportive relationship between you.
Be patient when answering the child’s questions, do not move away from them
Talk more and discuss together the “things” that the child had in kindergarten. Be sincerely interested in what they played today, what they ate, where they walked. Share your experience and help your child solve difficult situations for him: for example, what to do if you don’t feel like sleeping, but you need to, how to behave with a friend if he is offended, and is it possible to play with one toy together and not quarrel.
Gradually expand the baby’s circle of acquaintances
Then big companies will not be a surprise for him. So the child will quickly learn to find contact with children of different ages, become sociable and acquire the makings of a leader.
Drawing, sculpting, playing with sand, appliqués will help transfer fears and self-doubt to paper or other objects, live them in an environmentally friendly way and let go.
Act out problem situations in kindergarten
Invite your child to stage a dramatization with his favorite toys: the bear will become a teacher, the baby doll will turn into a best friend, we will make the robot a bully, and the little man from the designer will win back the child himself. Speak for all the participants of the “play” in different voices, give each other advice, argue and watch how the toys, and with them the baby himself, will find the right solution!
Praise your child for his achievements
But don’t do it with familiar phrases like “well done”, “good girl”, etc. Such words state a given that the baby is smart and everything works out for him. There is no place in this praise for development and emphasis on what exactly the child does best. Add a little more detail to the verbal encouragement: “You did a great job with this application. And you did a wonderful job of matching the colors and being able to cut all the pieces out of the paper yourself. I’m proud of you!”. This approach leaves room for the development of the child and emphasizes his strengths.
We do not recommend doing this:
Shame him for crying and tantrums, especially in the presence of strangers.
Promising to call a policeman or give it to “someone else’s uncle or aunt” will only increase the child’s fear.
Run unnoticed from the garden while the little one is distracted by the teacher.
For even more recommendations and anti-advice from IQsha teachers and psychologists on adapting children to kindergarten, see the article “Adaptation of a child in kindergarten”.
Together we analyzed the main problems that a child faces in kindergarten. The decision of each of them, first of all, lies with the parents. The degree of adaptation of a preschooler in kindergarten depends on your attitude to the child and his characteristics, the ability to adapt to them and look for the right approach.
Preparation decides a lot, so try to teach your baby self-care skills, provide him with communication with peers and follow the regimen. Be tolerant, attentive to the emotions and feelings of the child, support him. Then you can overcome all difficulties.
Pay attention to these articles:
What to do if the child fights?
What to do if the child does not obey?
Ekaterina Doroshina, teacher, IQsha methodologist, author of articles and exercises
The first days of a child in kindergarten
The first days of a child in kindergarten are the most exciting period for parents and responsible for educators and the child.
The first day is difficult, both for the child and for the parents. There are several recommendations to make this day more successful:
1. Do not be nervous and do not show your anxiety on the eve of the child’s admission to kindergarten.
REMEMBER! Anxiety and anxiety of parents is transferred to children.
2. Only send a child to kindergarten if he or she is healthy.
3. Tell the caregiver about your child’s personality, what he likes and dislikes, what his skills and abilities are, what kind of help he needs, determine what methods of reward and punishment are acceptable for your child.
4. Separation from parents is especially difficult for children if they are brought in at 8 o’clock in the morning and left until evening. It is advisable in the first days to bring the child only for a walk, where the conditions resemble those of a domestic yard; here it is easier for the child to navigate, it is easier to get to know the teacher and other children.
5. In getting used to new conditions, an important role is played by the ability to “minimize” the situation; bring your favorite toy with you. She will capture the attention of the child and help distract him from parting with loved ones. Try to persuade him to leave the toy to spend the night in the kindergarten and meet her again in the morning, or let the toy walk with him every day and get to know others there, ask what happened to the toy in kindergarten, who was friends with her, was she sad. Thus, you will learn about how your baby manages to get used to the kindergarten.
6. Tell your child all the time that he is dear to you and loved.
The first week of a child in kindergarten
baby at home, you need to be patient. It may seem to you that the child’s behavior suddenly changes – he becomes more capricious, in the evenings you may expect unexpected tantrums with or without a reason, scandals accompanied by screaming, crying, throwing objects and wallowing on the floor. Some parents may be horrified at the sight of such a drastic change and blame the kindergarten for it.
There may be several reasons. Firstly, indeed, adaptation to the kindergarten is a great stress for the child, his nerves are tense and they need a release. In addition, surrounded by strangers, the child often tries to restrain negative emotions, so that they splash out only in the evening.
How to help the child at this stage?
1. A calm, conflict-free climate should be created for him in the family. Spare the weakened nervous system of the child. Do not increase, but reduce the load on the nervous system – temporarily stop going to the circus, the theater, to visit. Significantly reduce TV viewing.
2. Do not react to antics and do not punish whims.
3. Don’t leave your child in the garden for the whole day! The first week, drive it for 2-3 hours, then the time increases to 5-6 hours.
4. Play with your child homemade toys in kindergarten, where one of them will be the child himself. Watch what this toy does, what it says, help your child find friends for her, and if you notice problems with the baby, use it to orient the game towards positive results.
5. From the very beginning, help your child to easily enter kindergarten. After all, for the first time in his life he parted with the house, with you, moving away from you, although only for a few hours. And when parting, do not forget to assure that you will certainly return for him.