Joyful childcare: Joyful Child Care in Elkridge

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A child under one year old: useful advice to parents

The upbringing of a child begins from the first weeks of his life. From birth to one year, this is a period of active physical development of the baby, adaptation to the world around him, and the acquisition of the first experience. We have collected useful tips for parents on raising and caring for a child in the first year of his life

Photo: pixabay.com

Young families are waiting with excitement and joy for the birth of a child. From the moment when a woman confesses to a man that they will soon become parents, until the moment when the baby grows up and becomes a little independent, the life of mom and dad is filled with anxieties and worries.

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Despite the experience gained by a huge number of generations of caring for newborns and very young children, the happiness of young parents is always accompanied by worries and fears. Therefore, it is very important to help inexperienced parents overcome all difficulties and let them know that they will do just fine. And even in cases where the child is not the first in the family, moms and dads can always learn something new.

For those parents who are worried that they will not be able to stock up on everything they need before the birth of a child, for example, the website of the Moscow City Health Department can help, which offers a list of what should be ready for the birth of a baby. There is also a list of what not to buy. And then there are detailed recommendations for caring for the child.

Let’s start with hygiene. The baby needs to be bathed every day. At the same time, the room should be about 18 to 22 degrees Celsius, and the water should be about 37 degrees. Soap, even baby soap, cannot be washed with newborns, as it dries the skin. There are special baby foams, which, however, can be used no more than twice a week. It is recommended to wash your hair once a week with a special baby shampoo. Wipe the child should be very carefully, and do not even wipe, but carefully blot the skin with a towel.
Baby skin folds should be treated twice a day with a protective care product. So the skin will be protected from the irritating effect of natural secretions and excess moisture.

Eyes are recommended to be carefully wiped with gentle movements towards the nose with a separate cotton swab, previously moistened with warm boiled water.
Nails should be cut as they grow, and it is best during sleep, so as not to frighten the child and his arms and legs were relaxed.

Diapers should be changed regularly, with a break of 15-20 minutes between changes to allow the skin to breathe a little.

Diapers and undershirts must be changed twice a day, and all the child’s underwear must be ironed.

You need to walk with your child every day, provided that in clear weather the temperature is up to -10, and in case of precipitation and strong winds up to -5 degrees. You need to dress the baby, taking into account the fact that he should have one more layer of clothing than an adult. The duration of the walk should be gradually increased, starting with 10-15 minutes.
Of course, the best food for a baby is breast milk. However, it often happens that the mother, for one reason or another, does not have enough milk. It doesn’t matter, artificial mixtures will come to your aid. And your pediatrician will help you not to make a mistake in choosing the most suitable mixture and to choose the right volume. As the child grows, complementary foods, that is, new foods, are gradually introduced.

Development

In the first month of life, the baby actively moves his arms and legs, clenching his fists. He also begins to fix his gaze, follow moving objects and smiles for the first time.

In the second month, the baby begins to raise his head and tries to hold it. Hearing a sound, he tries to find its source. The eyes are focused better. It is recommended to decorate the room with bright things to make it easier for the child to focus his eyes. Also move objects in the child’s field of vision, play with toys above the crib. It is also important to talk with the child, comment on their actions, change intonation.

At three months, the baby is holding his head well. He can already determine the source of the sound and recognizes the voice of his mother.

As they grow older, it is recommended to play “finger games” with the child. Up to four or five months, this is the usual massage of the fingers, as well as their stroking and straightening. Gradually, you can begin to carefully bend your fingers.
At four months, the child already has some independence, and he begins to explore the world. Parents can now sleep more peacefully at night, but during the day the baby needs an eye and an eye. At this age, a grasping reflex appears, the child reaches for toys, tries them. Also, the baby learns to sit down.
For about half a year, he confidently grabs toys, rolls over by himself and can sit for several seconds. Many children have their first tooth erupted at this age.
Also at six months, children consciously smile when they see their parents, babble happily and express emotions.

It is necessary to play with the child, showing him objects of different shapes and textures.
You can gradually begin to teach your child simple syllables. Read nursery rhymes to your child, focusing on the syllables.

During this period of life your child is learning to crawl and needs to be encouraged to do so. Bright toys are perfect for this. When he rolls over on his tummy, put a bright object at a short distance from him, and the child will want to crawl towards the object.

Children at this age can also be taught to shift a toy from one hand to the other.

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The seven-month-old baby is already growing up noticeably, and he likes to look at the pictures. You need to show him photos, and he will recognize loved ones. At this age, many children for the first time can say the words “mom” and “dad”. You need to help them put simple syllables into words.

At eight to nine months, the child will consciously and distinctly say the word “mother”. He will pull your hand, trying to get your attention.
At about ten months, the baby already understands adults quite well and, for example, can find a toy at your request and bring it, so it is important to develop this skill in him. Gradually, you need to teach the child not only to open the lid of the box, but also to close it, and also to put toys there.

At eleven months, most children begin to walk. They also learn to squat and bend over. It is important to continue to play with the child, collect pyramids or towers from cubes.

By the age of one, the child already begins to walk confidently, can speak about ten simple words, knows the names of relatives. Also, the baby can already drink from a cup. During this period, you can begin to teach the child to wash and dress himself. A more independent period of his life begins.

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how my husband became a housewife after having a baby

This story is from the Community. The editors asked leading questions, carefully edited and designed according to the standards of the journal.

Valeria

did not go on maternity leave

Author profile

I am 24 years old, my husband is 35, and my son is eight months old. We did not plan to replenish the family, but we were not opposed to having a child, and therefore we did not particularly protect ourselves.

Pregnancy was easy for me, but my husband had problems at that time: he lost his job and could not find a new one. We decided that he would stay at home and help me take care of the child, and I would go to work. At first, the relatives did not like it, but then they reconciled.

Preparation for the decree

Work. I teach drawing and painting at a private school. Before giving birth, she worked three days a week, in total 20 hours came out, now – eight or nine. I like stability in my work: the salary is always on time. I don’t like the inflexibility of the system – for example, you can’t take a vacation in the middle of the school year, only in the summer. But these are features of the sphere of education, and not of a particular school.

During my pregnancy, due to lack of work, my husband took up housekeeping: he cleaned, washed dishes, cooked, went shopping, walked the dog two or three times a day, and at the same time looked for vacancies.

The search was complicated by the fact that he has many different skills, but there are no reviews from past jobs and a beautiful work record, and the resume is very scattered, therefore, not very attractive. The husband knows how to set up networks, work with tools, understands electrics and can manage people.

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He is a chef by training, but he has little experience in catering, and his husband was not eager to return there. Therefore, I looked mainly at the vacancies of a system administrator – according to the last position held.

Relocation. Even before our relationship with him, I rented part of a house in the Moscow region: I paid 15,000 R monthly for two rooms and a kitchen. There was a clause in the agreement with the owner that I live alone, but I can have animals and invite friends. There was no mention of children.

Over time, I got into a permanent relationship and got pregnant. The hostess had a country house on the same plot, and she periodically came. When her stomach began to swell, she noticed it and said that I would have a family and therefore the terms of the lease were changing. The child will cry, and since the audibility is good, we will disturb her. We decided to move into a two-room apartment with my husband’s mother – she was not against it.

Gen. I wanted the housing to be more comfortable, and I offered to redo it. They didn’t hire a team – the husband took care of the repairs. And I ordered the necessary materials, furniture and appliances on the Internet with home delivery. We chose everything together. It took 25-40% of our income.

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My husband also greeted me from work with a massage and a hot dinner. His specialties are lasagna, cherry pies, grilled meats. Mmm! It suited me more than completely.

We save quite a lot on the services of a repair team

Decree

During pregnancy, I felt good and therefore worked until the birth. I got to work by metro: I walked from home to the station for ten minutes at a walking pace, and then for another half an hour – to the school itself.

In addition to her main work, until the eighth month of pregnancy, she took artistic orders for painting and periodically held master classes at events. Until the ninth month, I was engaged in tutoring: I had five students, to whom I went a couple of times a week.

/working-mom/

I have been working remotely since the first day of the child’s life

The last working day was four days before the birth, and I wrote a retroactive application for the birth itself at my own expense. The authorities were horrified: they had never encountered a woman who did not want to go on maternity leave, and did not know how to register me. In the end, I only took parental leave.

I didn’t want to go on maternity leave for several reasons. First of all, I like my job, I like to have money earned by my work. But it would be hard for me to sit at home all day, my husband is a big homebody. In addition, I understood that money would not be superfluous. In general, it happened on its own, but it was I who suggested this option: he helps with the child, and I work.

The husband reacted normally. We discussed this as early as the fifth month of pregnancy – hypothetically. He did not have a stereotype that a woman should sit with a child. But I felt the pressure of relatives and friends. At first, they took our decision with hostility and insisted that “the husband should provide for the family, and the wife should stay at home with the children.” But over time they got used to it.

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Meet the father who went on maternity leave

Childbirth

Childbirth did not start in any way, and on the 41st week I went to a concert of my favorite group to dance. And when she returned home, contractions began. They were soft, I just had dinner and went to bed, and in the morning I woke up, had breakfast, got ready, waited until rush hour subsided, and my husband and I took the metro to the hospital. The road ran through a snow-covered park, so we took a walk. It was beautiful and joyful. This is the brightest event of pregnancy.

I gave birth under compulsory medical insurance and I think that I was very lucky with the maternity hospital. We got a good doctor and a midwife, the ward was for three people, no one cursed at us, and it was comfortable. The food was also good, although I still asked to bring me tasty treats like apple marshmallow and corn sticks.

They also explained the basics of caring for a child. At first, doing everything yourself was, of course, scary.

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My husband and I had a partner birth

Life on maternity leave

How we learned to care for a child. During pregnancy, I attended special courses, and after the birth of my son, I consulted with my mother on some issues. But basically, we learned everything by doing. Sometimes it seems to me that my husband even takes better care of the child, since he is softer than me in character. I like to manage finances, plan a budget, I’m more businesslike.

What they were not ready for. The first two months on maternity leave were the most difficult: due to colic, the child cried for days on end and it was not always possible to quickly calm him down. He also wanted to be constantly on the handles, and during the day he slept only two or three hours. So I was glad to go to work to reboot.

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Now the baby is teething – there are also difficult days, but less often. A big plus is that my husband and I can change each other, go to another room, mind our own business, take a walk without our son. It is already so much easier that we are even thinking about a second child. There is a mental resource for this, and the weather also has its advantages: you won’t have to buy a lot, and it will be more fun for children to play together.

Routine. My husband is still doing repairs and helps me a lot with the baby – I’m glad he doesn’t work.

I plan purchases and order diapers, complementary foods in a timely manner, I look for interesting things like jumpers on Avito, I read information about children. I make an appointment with doctors and go with the child to the clinic. I also like choosing clothes for him.

At first, she fed her son with expressed breast milk: he did not breastfeed, and I decided not to bother – my nerves were dearer to me, I fed him with formula. After six months, they almost completely switched to formula and complementary foods, they eat breast milk a couple of times a day.

The husband gets up at night to change the baby’s diapers. He puts it on and, since we use only bodysuits and overalls, he doesn’t confuse anything. We walk and bathe together or take turns, we also feed together, although the husband feeds more often.

In general, we sit with the child approximately equally: I do more on those days when I am not working, my husband – when I am at work or at a driving school, which I visit three times a week. There were no special mistakes, but sometimes I don’t have the patience to calm the child in the evenings, and my husband in the mornings. So here we also usually alternate.

Work. After giving birth, I felt good and went to work within a week. I teach eight to nine hours a week so as not to lose vacation pay. The management distributed the rest of the hours among colleagues. And when my son was six months old, she began to take part-time jobs at events.

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How to find time for yourself on maternity leave

My husband is not looking for a job yet: we are comfortable living with such a division of duties as now.

Rest. When we both get tired of the baby – for example, this was the case when teeth began to cut – we have the husband’s mother on the hook. She works three days a week, and we don’t put much pressure on her – she’s still our child. Sometimes she herself comes for 15 minutes to play with her grandson. And once every few weeks, we ask her to babysit for a couple of hours to free up the evening for two.

We spend this time in different ways. We delight ourselves with going for a couple of cups of coffee with croissants, riding electric scooters for rent or eating a delicious cake or pizza.

We also reboot separately: I am at work, and my husband walks his dog and every week he goes alone into the forest for three or four hours to relax in nature.

Income and expenses

After giving birth, I received a lump sum payment of 19,000 R. On parental leave, I am paid 14,000 R every month, the child allowance is about 17,000 R, plus I receive a salary of about 26,000 R. As a result, it comes out to 57,000 R. Every month, parents from both sides help us, most often the total comes out to about 20,000 R. We don’t refuse, but we don’t really count on this money.

We do not pay for renting an apartment. We don’t help with the payment of the communal flat either, but my mother-in-law insisted on this, I wouldn’t mind. Meals are also separate for her and me, but sometimes we treat each other with something. In total, we spend about 20,000 R per month on food, we spend 10,000-15,000 R on entertainment, 20,000-30,000 R on large purchases, clothes, materials for repairs and at home, about 10,000 R on a child.

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Payments and benefits for a child in 2022

I don’t understand why people spend astronomical amounts associated with the birth of a child. The stroller was given by friends. We bought a crib at Avito for 1000 R. I sewed the sheets and diapers myself from idle fabric. Toys were presented by friends and acquaintances – even more than necessary. And children’s clothing on marketplaces costs about 200 R per item – a bodysuit or overalls.

Among the ads you can even find children’s furniture for free. Source: avito.ru The child does not care how fashionable the clothes are. Source: market.yandex.ru

I spend 2500 R per month on diapers. We spend from three to five pieces a day. I take two packages of 58 pieces, each costing 1100-1200 R.

It takes about 4000-5000 R. The mixture takes about 4000-5000 R. We take hypoallergenic for 1200-1600 R with a volume of 750 g. Up to six months we spent two cans per month, since there was more milk . Now complementary foods have appeared, but the child has also begun to eat more – on average, three cans are needed per month. In October I took three cans of 1290 Р, respectively, I spent 3870 Р on the mixture.

We spend another 1000-2000 Р on complementary foods. We usually have two or three open packs of porridge, but a new pack costs 200 R – it lasts for a month. Every month I buy about ten packs of cottage cheese – 40 R apiece, four jars of mashed meat – 70 R apiece. For 30 R I take juice, boxes are enough for two days, and I buy about ten a month. We get mashed vegetables in the dairy kitchen or prepare ourselves from carrots, potatoes, broccoli, cauliflower, zucchini and apples, which we buy at the market near the house.

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How to introduce complementary foods to children

Sometimes we use wet wipes – it takes a couple of packs a month. When I go to the doctor, I take disposable diapers, but they last for a long time. From baby care products I use baby soap, shampoo, gel, moisturizing baby cream. I only bought baby soap – a piece is enough for more than a month. The rest was given to us. For the first three months I used a diaper cream – a jar was enough for a couple of months, I bought it for 400 R.

When I started teething, I sometimes started using dental ointment. A tube costs about 500 R, now we use the second one all the time.

I spend about 1000 R every month on vitamins for recovery after childbirth. I plan to take them at least until the moment when the child is one year old.

Family expenses ~58,500—75,500 R per month

Item of expenditure

Amount

Large purchases, clothes, materials for repair and house

20 000-30 000 R

power

20 000 R

Entertainment

10 000-15 000 R

Children’s food 9000-7000-7000 Р

Diapers

2500 R

Vitamins for recovery after childbirth

1000 R

Advice to future parents

I am very glad that my husband is at home: we have avoided many problems that married couples face in which a man works a lot.